When you meet someone for the first time, how do you know what to say? Or how to present yourself? Surely you would act differently with different people, but if you did not have much to go by, how would you decide to behave in front of the person? Is all this instinctive or learned? Whatever the case, there is no doubting that interpersonal communication is a huge element of our lives.
A few weeks ago, I met someone who was visiting Singapore for the first time. He was an American and had actually never been out of the States prior to his trip here. Based on cultural and sociological information, I knew that I definitely had to cut the "Singlish" terms out of my vocabulary or he was probably not going to understand a word I said. Since it was going to be our first meeting, I could not gather any psychological information, like what his demeanour was. Therefore, not knowing what he was like exactly, I expected my interpersonal communication with him would be limited to very awkward, superficial conversation, at least initially.
During our first engagement, I realised within the first one minute that he was not that different at all. In fact, his personality and sense of humour were very much similar to most of my other friends. Therefore, based on stimulus generalisation, I found conversing with him rather effortless. The only thing that really got him confused was when I mentioned "football". "Oh! You mean soccer?" He clarified. Over time, through dyadic primacy, I found out that he was a little more emotionally sensitive than some of my other buddies, and so, by stimulus discrimination, I avoided teasing him too much. Overall, it was refreshing to meet someone from a different land and learn that they aren't so different after all.
As I continue on life's journey and meet new people from all walks of life, the importance of effective interpersonal communication has become more evident to me. I have come to understand how it can be so powerful in persuasion, forming positive first impressions, and of course in building relationships with people. Mastering effective interpersonal communication can bring many benefits and in today's ever-growing population, with people becoming increasingly judgmental on looks and personality, has possibly become a necessity. Otherwise, we run the risk of becoming social outcasts. What do you think?
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9 comments:
We are aware of difference between people. However, at times we can be overly conscious of it that it interferes with our interaction with people. Thus, i feel that we should always meet someone with an open mind no matter who the person is. After all, if we don't do so, it will be very difficult to survive in society. We are almost never self sufficient and need to depend on other people emotional and physically.
With hundreds of companies offering public speaking, excellent interpersonal communication courses. We can be assured the importance of communication in our live's now. Meeting New people is fun if you are someone fun, but if you are a bore then i guess it can be a chore.
I particulary enjoyed the use of "comms terms" in your entry. Thanks for showing examples of application.
:)
usually when meeting someone new for the first time, i will be slightly reserved and be more aware of my actions. it is interesting to observe people from the get go.
interpersonal communication is indeed important for the continuation of the friendship. a skill that takes time to hone, is it crucial for almost every aspect of our daily lives.
Meeting people for the first time is definitely more fun than a chore. But maintaining the relationship is indeed quite tedious.
Yes, we should be aware of the person's cultural background in order to make communication more effective. There should not be too much confusion or conflict especially when 2 people are speaking the same language, even though different cultures may have unique slangs or accents.
Bryan, what can i say? For me meeting people is most certaily NOT a chore. But as we all know, the importance of first impressions. Not only that, but when you actually do engage in a conversation what needs to keep it going. For many people, they find it hard to maintain or hold up a conversation for long probably because of a lack of common topics.
There is not an iota of doubt as to how crucial this skill is in our daily living. Be it, in our social circle or a business meeting.
Nice article otherwise.
:)
I remember a saying "No man's an island"(please correct me if I'm wrong) . Everyone in this world is somehow inter-related and we can't pretty much live without some form of communications with other people in the society . With that said , I think it doesn't matter if you find meeting new people fun or a chore . You still have to do it at the end of the day .
If that is the case , anyone who finds meeting new people a chore better start finding some fun in it and make it more enjoyable =)
Hi Bryan. Understanding how communication works is useful for our daily communication, but I think that interpersonal communication also involves some chemistry.(which is also about reprocity and liking) Moreover, I don't think that I would consciously think about the principles of communcation as I engage in a conversation, because that is what I would think about after it ends, if necessary.
Nevertheless, you have written a good entry.
Well I guess most of us feel that we need interpersonal relationships in our lives, but is it really impossible to be successful in life without much interpersonal communication? What if your personality is one that does not enjoy interaction with others?
If you are an introvert and are comfortable being along most of the time, then meeting new people is not a necessity and would most likely be a chore. If you thrive on human connection and love to socialise, then by all means make as many friends as you want to satisfy that need! We are all different, and choosing to lead our lives in different ways doesn't necessarily give rise to one lifestyle being better than the other. In the end, we should just do what we are comfortable with.
That being said, even introverts need human connection. How much of it they need and get, though, is another subjective question. Perhaps family contacts are enough to sustain them.
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